Low Hanging

Captain William Teglia’s ‘Schmidty’s Salty Blue Balls‘ are holding truer to the last part of their name than they would like through six weeks of play. The ‘Balls’ are ‘scoring’ at a middle-of-the-pack rate, but their 1-4-1 record reflects that they are certainly not ‘closing the deal’/’getting lucky’. Royal Blue will need to tighten up, start producing, and find some real release in their final three games, or it will be *snip snip*…out of the playoff picture.

As we begin our gentle slope into the playoffs, a subset of teams scramble to stay clear of the cut line cliff. While no teams are in ‘must win’ mode just yet, the matchups in the middle ground of the standings take on almost as much meaning as those in the dreary depths. Captain Wendy Enright’s Red came into Week Six on an upward swing, having tied Green in Week Four, and beaten Royal Blue in Week Five to finally even their record at 2-2-1. Captain Mason Holcomb’s Purple, by contrast, were on the down escalator, with losses to Neon and Brown dropping them to 2-3-0. So, the second half of the season kicked off with one team looking to continue their upward momentum, and the other looking to arrest their fall. Andy Strathman had Red on the front foot first with his first (!) goal and first (!) point of the season at 5:13 (Jon Zygelman), but Joe Malki provided an unassisted answer less than a minute later. In an eerie coincidence, 5:13 would also be the time of the first goal in the second period, with Dorothy Kline’s first (!) goal/point of the season (Tim Vick & Trevor Vick) wresting the lead back for Red before Joe Malki (this time a little over a minute later) responded (Chris Malki & Shawna Hamon). Trevor Vick kept the back and forth scoring pattern going with his first (!) of the season at 1:57 in the second (Tim Vick & Payam Sazegar), but that is where the pattern would abruptly come to an end. Jon Cima (17/19) made his team’s three tallies stand with a perfect 8/8 third in Red’s 3-2 win, while Captain Holcomb’s perfect 7/7 third (in a valiant 17/20 effort) could not save Purple from a third straight loss. The win propels Red into the top half of the standings at 3-2-1, and with the 1-4-1 White up next, they may well punch their playoff ticket this Sunday. Purple’s road is considerably rockier, with powerhouse Pink up next. A fourth straight loss, combined with a win for either White or Royal Blue, would plant Purple below the cut line with just two games to go.

Captain Sean Bathgate’s ‘Turd Burgenson’ were circling the bowl after a tough opening pair of opponents in Pink (6-2 loss) and Neon (3-1 loss) had wiped out their first two efforts, but had since mustered wins over Baby Blue and Purple to arrive at Week Six at 2-3-0. The only unaccounted for loss in the previous sentence…a disastrous Week Four flushing at the hands of then-winless Royal Blue. A loss like that certainly saps the expected confidence a team would/should have against other struggling teams, and Captain Nick Meglich’s White certainly falls into the ‘struggling team’ category. Coming in at 1-3-1, White were as close as any team to ‘must win’ country to start the second stretch of the season, but a win over Brown would move them above the cut line, and indeed above Brown with three weeks to play. Rob Gaudio put White on the path to realizing that rally to redemption, notching his second of the season just 0:36 in (Eric Willard & Maureen Ruchhoeft), but Mark DeGraffenreid equalized at 5:32, completing a nifty passing chain from Captain Bathgate to Austin Szymanski. The gorgeous backdoor feed was Szymanski’s first SDFHL point…CONGRATULATIONS, Austin! The intensity remained high in the second, though the shot counts (a mere 4-2, in Brown’s favor) were meager, and the scoring stripped down to a single strike…a sweet and subtle five hole tip on a centering feed for super sub, Hima Joshi. Marc Lapointe was the primary on the Joshi goal (Chris Tran the second), with his yeoman forechecking efforts leading to a hard-fought 2-1 Brown lead going into the third. The shots and scoring ratcheted up in a wacky final period, with Chris Tran padding Brown’s lead at 4:39 (Erin Plone), then tucking home and empty-netter (Mark DeGraffenreid)…the presumptive deal-sealer to make it 4-1. Jerry Gonzales had other ideas, cashing in at 1:04 (Gaudio), then 0:36 (Vance Morra) to cut the lead back to one and leave the Brown bench stunned and sweating to the final buzzer. That final buzzer did come with no further heroics, however, with Mason Holcomb (11/14) preserving a vital 4-3 win for Brown in Matt Henderson’s absence. Captain Meglich was also absent, but Will Heinl (20/23) was his more than capable stand-in in the losing effort. The win has Brown level at 3-3-0…smack in the middle of the standings going into the final third of the season. They hope to keep their distance from the likes of their next opponent, the 1-3-2 Grey, and push closer to a playoff perch in the process. White will need to start their playoff push in earnest this Sunday, as Captain Meglich returns to lead his team against a resurgent Red.

‘MacBlueber’ made the front page in Week One, after pulling off an incredible 2-1 coup at Red’s expense, in spite of being outshot 34-12, and in spite of the absence of their top two offensive weapons in Kalen Hunter and Luke Wolmer. Captain Rob LaVigne & Company have continued to strut through the summer season after that stunning start, even toppling the seemingly untoppleable Pink in Week Four after suffering their own (and only) shocking loss to Brown the week prior. Their 4-1-0 mark coming into their Week Six middle match with Captain Bao Nguyen’s 2-2-1 Green was good for a share of first place, and having already vanquished one of those shareholders (Pink), really anything but a loss would make them the first team to punch a playoff ticket. Green’s last outing was a 6-3 loss to said supercharged shareholder (Pink), and the Week Six hope was not just a bounce back, but a big win over a clear Cup favorite to make a strong statement, push into the lead pack, and draw closer to a playoff berth of their own. Four small problems fulfilling that hope…the absences of Brennen Abel, Dave Bourgouin, Mostafa Azab, and Nick Vacchio. So…short bench and long odds for Green, but…you never know. The favorites came out firing in this one, with Baby Blue outshooting Green by a 10-2 margin, but Sean Kelly was absolutely on another planet in another solar system somewhere in the Amazeballs Galaxy in this one. Will Heinl did manage to find a sliver of space (Amazeballs Galaxy callback, for the win) to slide home the first goal of the game for Baby Blue at 7:38 (Captain LaVigne), but that would be all Kelly would allow through that 10-2 first, and the FIFTEEN TO ZERO period to follow. I repeat/clarify…Baby Blue racked up fifteen shots in the second to Green’s zero…and yet this remained a 1-0 game going into the third. LaVigne & Company had to be feeling confident going into that third, but might also have felt a tinge of fear that they could have a much-deserved win snatched from them, just as they had snatched a much-deserved win from Red in their season debut. Luke Wolmer finally provided an opportunity for a collective Baby Blue exhale with 3:38 to play (Gary Peters & Kalen Hunter), and while the lopsided shot count continued (14-2 for Baby Blue), one of those two Green shots did find twine at 0:05…Steve Goncalo (Captain Nguyen). When the dust (mainly from the relentless flurry of Baby Blue shots) settled, Chris Tran (3/4) would collect his team’s fifth win…perhaps the easiest of his career…2-1 over Green. At the other end…an absolutely ridiculous 37/39 museum piece from Sean ‘Da Kid’ Kelly…probably one of the most heartbreaking regular season losses of his storied career. The win, combined with other Week Six results, locked Baby Blue is as the first official playoff participant. Their Week Seven opponent, Neon, will likely be the last true challenge to their quest to finish at the top of the pack. Green, meanwhile, remain in stable playoff condition in spite of the loss, especially given that two of their remaining three opponents, Royal Blue and Grey, are below them in the standings, with each having managed just one win to this point in the season.

Very much unlike their lighter blue brethren, Captain William Teglia’s Royal Blue have finally made the front page…for all the wrong reasons. With White’s loss earlier in the evening dropping them 1-4-1, the cellar door was ajar and ready to be kicked open. A win would allow Teglia & Company to cross to the safe side of the cut line threshold, and improve their record to 2-3-1 in the leadup to their Week Seven matchup with a 2-3-1 Green. In short, this was THE chance to turn everything around…they just needed to climb the stairs to that door and…SLAM! I forgot to mention that Captain John Boddy’s Pink was guarding that door, and while already sitting pretty at 4-1-0, Pink was pumped and primed to keep pace with Baby Blue in the race to the top seed. Jackson Tomaszewski put Pink on top first with his fourth of the season at 2:21 (Ryan Loughran & Captain Boddy), but Jon Salt answered on the power play at 0:40 with his nearly-league-leading eighth (Janet Goins). It was all Pink in the middle frame, with Tomaszewski snapping home his second of the game at 8:25 (Elyse Shattuck), and Geoff Downes adding some padding at 3:59 (Loughran & Tomaszewski). You’re (almost) always in a game with Silas ‘The Silencer’™ Perks as your last line of defense, and even with a lopsided shot ledger (28-11 in Pink’s favor from start to finish), and a short bench (Captain Teglia, Gordon Schmidt, Jason Northrup, and Steph Palomo Schmidt all out), Royal Blue still had a chance to rescue at least a point with ten minutes to play. Enter our POTW, newcomer Jenna Chercoe. Chercoe was still in search of her first career SDFHL point, and having that first point come in the form of a goal would be golden. Lo and behold…Jenna Chercoe at 8:36 in the third from Brendan Jew and Jon Salt…CONGRATU…wait…Jenna was serving as a sub for Steph…so while her goal would bring Royal Blue a step closer in a rally to tie, it would not actually count as her first career goal…*sad trombone*. Still, with plenty of time left on the clock, Royal Blue were still in it to win it against a powerhouse Pink…until that ‘plenty of time’ became ‘a few minutes’, then a ‘few seconds’, then…buzzer. Will Heinl (9/11) would hold on to seal Royal Blue’s losing fate, 3-2, while ‘The Silencer’™ (25/28) was left making plans to meet up with Sean Kelly at the local chapter of the Lack Of Goal Support Support Group™. The win books playoff passage for Pink, and drops Royal Blue to 1-4-1. A win over Green this Sunday is now as close to a must as it gets (without being a true ‘must’). A nasty Neon waits for Teglia’s crew in Week Eight, and (as the SDFHL fates always have it) the final game of the final week of play will be Royal Blue v White…the two current cellar dwellers. Either (or both) teams may still have a shot to survive at that point, but they will both need points between now and then or the point will be moot.

Jenna Chercoe scored ‘her first career SDFHL’ goal in a sub role for Royal Blue, but of course that *sad trombone* signaled that ‘sub goals do not count toward career numbers’. No one likes a sad trombone, but Jenna apparently hates them. Just TWELVE seconds into the nightcap, with Chercoe and her Grey mates desperate for their first win of the season against a very tough Neon side…BANG…*happy trombone*! It’s comical, if you imagine that someone tapped Chercoe on the shoulder to inform her that her goal for Royal Blue would ‘not count’…then she dons the shirt for her true team, scores a ‘true’ goal, and struts off with a ‘count THAT’ expression on her face. That’s how I want to imagine it all unfolding, but I am sure Chercoe was much more demure (as the kids say) about the milestone strike to put Grey in front at 9:48 (Josh Tran). However it went down…CONGRATULATIONS, JENNA! It should be noted that this was the first lead of the season for Grey! Captain Winstead was so inspired that he followed with his first of the season at 5:12 (Jeremy Copp) to double that lead and send shockwaves through Neon’s ranks. After all, Captain Carl Vankoughnett’s Neon came in as heavy favorites at 4-1-0, and with the return of ‘The Albatross’, Justin Hepler, all of the smart money was on the (considerably) brighter clad brigade. Hepler did answer for Neon later in the first…JUST beating out the final tick of the clock to cut the lead back to one with a gut punch goal at 0:01 (Captain Vankoughnett & Ryan Karns). Jordan Pynn lit the lone lamp in the second, converting at 2:36 (Mark Scelfo & Dan Jurgens) to restore Grey’s two goal edge, and check off another modest milestone…the first time Grey had managed to score more than two goals in a single game. Neon pushed back hard in the third, racking up a 9-1 edge in shots en route to a 28-12 show of shot dominance, but alas…in the absence of their true superstar, one Patricia H Gladstone, the most Neon could muster in the way of response was a solitary strike from the stick of rookie sensation, Darin Cerasuolo. DC’s fifth of the season (Hepler) came at 5:48, but Don Tran (26/28) would finally get the offensive support he needed to lock in a Grey win…a massive 3-2 coup over Neon. Chuck Bender (9/12) shouldered just his second loss in six tries, but now at 4-2-0, Neon are still a virtual playoff lock with three games to go. They do face two titans in their final stretch in Baby Blue and Pink, with a desperate and potentially dangerous Royal Blue in that mix, as well. Grey can only bask in the glow of their first win for so long…they still have a lot of work left to do to make safely into August play, with three tough, but beatable teams remaining on their slate in Brown, Purple, and Green.

Awkward Position

Captain Tyler Winstead & Company may well live by their namesake ‘It’s Not Grey In A Threeway’ credo, but Grey has struggled with (for lack of a better term) some impotency issues to this point in the season, with a league worst five goals in five games. Whether their flaccid five game run is the result of a lack of confidence, ‘stage fright’, or some other menage of emotions is unclear, but at 0-3-2, they find themselves as not-so-power bottoms in desperate need of a late season thrust…

A Week Four loss to a short-benched Royal Blue had Captain Sean Bathgate’s Brown feeling rather down about their playoff prospects coming into the midway point in the season. There’s usually a bright side to even the darkest situation, though, and ‘Turd Bergensen’ could take solace in the knowledge that three of their first four games of the season had come against the top three teams in the league (Pink, Neon, and Baby Blue). A loss ‘in the trenches’ to Royal Blue was painful, but a win over Captain Mason Holcomb’s 2-2-0 Purple would be a big swing in the right direction. Purple’s .500 path to Week Five, by contrast with Brown, was paved in part with opponents in the lower half of the active standings, with their two wins having come against White and Royal Blue…teams with a combined 2-6-2 record, as I type. So…this would loom as a ‘big game’ for both teams, with both looking to gain surer footing above the cutline and stay out of desperation mode down the stretch to the postseason. The nerves that accompanied the absence of their leading goal scorer, Joe Malki (3), were assuaged by an opening strike from the league’s eldest statesman (67), Steve Linke. Linke’s first of the season at 5:00 in the first (Chris Malki) gave Purple a 1-0 lead, but POTW Josh Wirt would strike back, and back, and back in the second. It was Wirt at 8:17 from Chris Tran and Matt Henderson, Wirt at 2:41 from Tran, and a Wirt solo effort to cap a natural hat trick at 1:11. Both sides continued to press in the third, but Wirt was once again the only damage doer, notching his fourth of the game, and league-leading ninth of the season with 4:31 to play (Erin Plone & John Kushneryk) to ice the 4-1 win for Brown. Matt Henderson (13/14) was perhaps more excited about his second career assist than his second win on the season, but with just one goal allowed in his last six periods of play, it is safe to say that his mates are most excited about his stellar play. The loss drops Mason Holcomb (21/25) and Purple into a tie with Brown in the lower-middle chunk of the standings at 2-3-0. Both teams are above the cutline, but far from safe as we enter the second half of the Summer 2025 season. Brown will look to even their record against a mostly woeful White (1-3-1), while Purple look to bounce back against a hit-or-miss Red (2-2-1) this Sunday.

The two weeks leading up to Week Five were just plain weird for Captain Rob LaVigne’s ‘MacBlueber’. The Baby Blue crew rolled into Week Three at 2-0-0, heavy favorites over an 0-2-0 Brown…only to get blanked 3-0 in one of the more stunning early season results. Week Four…a Kalen-less Baby Blue facing a very fearsome opponent in the 3-0-0 Pink…a Pink team with all of their power pieces in place, and looking like a rare wire to wire winning side…only to have Baby Blue bounce them 4-2 in a big bounce back win…another of the more stunning results of the early season. Captain Tyler Winstead’s Week Five cover team, ‘It’s Not Grey In A Threeway’ would have to hope for another stunner involving Baby Blue, with their playoff hopes fading with each notch in the loss column. At 0-2-2, and with just FOUR goals in those first four games, Grey would need a change…a spark…something, or someone to spur them to a statement win and save their sinking season. Kevin Hunter put a pause on any such poetic possibilities, clapping home his second of the season at 5:12 in the first (Kalen Hunter & Captain LaVigne) to put the favorites in a favorable position. Bryan Ossa’s unassisted fourth (!) of the season just twelve ticks later, combined with a 12-3 Baby Blue edge in shots, cast a considerable shadow over the prospect of a courageous Grey coup. Kalen Hunter matched his father’s output at 7:59 in the second (Luke Wolmer & Captain LaVigne), then recorded his second helper of the game on Wolmer’s strike at 3:59. A four goal third period lead is tough for any team to overcome, but with both Justin Stege and Captain Winstead out of the lineup, an underpowered and outmatched Grey seemed to be playing uphill and against the wind. Josh Tran did finally register a response with a brilliant effort at 8:01 in the third (Dan Jurgens & Kevin Dinino), but 4-1 was as close as they would get, and Kalen’s second of the game restored Baby Blue’s four point lead for good at 6:22 (Wolmer), sealing the 5-1 win over Grey. Chris Tran (13/14) continued his sensational season with his fourth win in as many tries…it’s worth noting that Baby Blue’s only loss came when Tran was playing out for Brown against his ‘other’ team back in Week Three. His 4-0-0/.943/1.25 line has him in the thick of the top tender pack through the first half of the season. His long lost cousin, Don Tran (26/31), could only do so much to stem the towering tide in his third loss of the season, dropping both his and his team’s record to 0-3-2 with four weeks to play. It certainly doesn’t get any easier for Grey this Sunday, as they take on 4-1-0 Neon. LaVigne & Company will look to keep pace with the lead pack (Pink/Baby Blue/Neon) with another strong outing against a dangerous, but perhaps underachieving 2-2-1 Green.

The creamy middle game of our creamy middle week of Summer 2025 play saw Captain John Boddy’s 3-1-0 Pink taking on Captain Bao Nguyen’s Green. The former…still stinging from their first loss of the season the Sunday prior, and raring for redemption. The latter…riding high off a 2-0-1 run that had their 3-2 Week One loss to Neon a dim and distant memory, with hopes to keep their lossless streak intact, and leapfrog one of the early season favorites in the process. While the shot count remained relatively even through the first period of play (12-10, in Pink’s favor), the scoreboard was pure Pink. Geoff Downes’ third of the season at 5:40 (Jackson Tomaszewski & Captain Boddy) made it 1-0, and his fourth of the season at 2:19 (Jason Lee) made it 2-0. Captain Boddy would give his team a 3-0 lead at 1:09 (Tomaszewski), and Pink were tickled to be back on top and in top form going into the first break. Pink poured on more in the second, with Boddy’s second of the game coming at 9:07 (Downes & Ryan Loughran), and rookie sensation, Liv Bryant, pushing a Boddy pass past Sean Kelly stand-in, Don Tran, at 5:23 to open a crushing 5-0 lead going into the third. That third was a fitting battle between Will and Abel, with Brennen Abel finally putting a ball behind Will Heinl to put Green on the board at 9:20 (Steve Goncalo). Tomaszewski would erase that effort with his first goal and third point of the night less than a minute later (Boddy & Loughran), but Abel would set the table for Nick Vacchio’s first (!) of the season at 7:04, then send home his second of the game with 1:21 to play (Vacchio & Sadie Hellstrom) to make it a three goal game down the final stretch. Alas for Captain Nguyen & Company, the late Green rush would prove too little, too late, as Heinl (23/26) and Pink would hold on for the 6-3 win, bouncing back from their first loss of the season, and (handily) handing Green their second. Don Tran (24/30) weathered another significant storm about as well as could be hoped (he faced 31 shots in a loss for his Grey team the game prior), but Pink is obviously THE offensive powerhouse this season, with their half dozen in this win putting them well in the lead for team goals-for at twenty-one. Green face another tough challenge in Baby Blue this Sunday…an opponent who boasts the second best goals-for total (16), but also shares the lowest goals-against total (8) with Neon. Pink will take their goal scoring arsenal into Week Six battle against one of the league’s best masked men (Silas Perks) and a down, but definitely not out Royal Blue.

The ‘trench battles’ are so important at this point in an SDFHL season, and nothing screams ‘TENCH’ like two 1-2-1 teams going head to head at what may turn out to be the crossroads of their respective seasons. Captain Wendy Enright’s Red suffered perhaps the most surreal loss of the season for any team, dropping a 2-1 decision to a Kalen-and-Luke-less Baby Blue in Week One, in spite of outshooting their foes 34-12. They went on to crush Grey 4-1 in their next outing, then get crushed 5-1 by Neon, and finally tie Green 1-1 in Week Four. Captain William Teglia’s Royal Blue had only just secured their first win of the season the Sunday prior, having bested Brown 5-3 to nudge above the cut line and prove they could survive (or even thrive) in the absence of The Silencer™. Perks (Silas) was back between the pipes for Royal Blue in this one, but Red had a returning Perks (Owen) of their own, adding a delicious layer of intrigue to an already spicy affair. It was Owen who would have the first laugh, putting Red on top at 7:14 in the first (Captain Enright & Jon Zygelman), and Captain Enright herself would double that lead at 3:54 (Tim Vick). Putting two past Perks (Silas) is no small feat, let alone two in one period. Even the best will crack under enough pressure, though, and while The Silencer™ cracked twice in the first, he held Red scoreless through the second, in spite of a 25-7 Red edge in shots through twenty minutes of play. Jon Salt set up a fight to the finish, notching his seventh of the season at 7:28 in the third (Vinny Santora) to finally put a smudge on Jon Cima’s clean sheet. Neither Perks (31/33), nor Cima (11/12) would budge from there out, and if your math is mathing correctly, you can see that Red prevailed in this thrilling edition of ‘The Perks-ness Stakes’, 2-1. So, an important outcome for both sides…with Red moving into the thick of the playoff pack at 2-2-1, and Royal Blue remaining cozied along the cut line at 1-3-1. Captain Teglia & Company now face a streak of bleak weeks, with 4-1-0 Pink this Sunday, followed by 2-2-1 Green, then 4-1-0 Neon. Red’s road to redemption is (on paper, at least) much smoother, with 2-3-0 Purple up next, and 1-3-1 White after the holiday break.

Captain Nick Meglich’s White finally earned a point in the standings with a 2-2 tie with basement buddies, Grey, in Week Four. While one point is better than none, Meglich & Company would need to start building on that lonely total in short order, or find themselves holding one of two short playoff straws come late July. Not the best time to line up against the only remaining undefeated side in Captain Carl Vankoughnett’s 4-0-0 Neon. Still, if ever there were an opportunity to topple a top dog, it would be this specific week, with Justin Hepler, Jim LaGrossa, and Pat Gladstone elsewhere (three players accounting for five goals and seven assists, coming in). Another twist…Captain Meglich himself would not be present, and the imposing form that is The Silencer™ would serve as surrogate shot-stopper. No team is in a ‘must win’ situation just yet, but this was a ‘really need to win’ situation at the very least for the winless wonders. Ryan Karns threw the first punch, punching his first of the season past Perks to give Neon a 1-0 lead at 8:32 in the first (Ramsey Ksar & Shelby Shattuck), but Rob Gaudio would punch back for White at 5:28 (Eric Willard), and Jerry Gonzales would serve as the ‘two’ in a one-two White combo, lacing home the go-ahead tally at 3:14. The Silencer™ himself was credited with the lone assist on the Gonzales goal…because we all needed that dude to start contributing offensively, FFS. ‘J-Gon’ would add a solo strike at 7:58 in the second, giving White the magic two goal lead that typically locks in a win with The Silencer™ backing your ranks. Up and coming young gun stud, Darin Cerasuolo, tested that ‘iron clad two goal lead’ adage with his fourth of the season at 4:54 in the third, but Perks (17/19) and White would hold on to secure their first win of the season, a 3-2 upstart upset over Neon. Chuck Bender (7/10) and Neon had finally suffered a loss, but can take the L with a rather sizeable grain of salt, given all of the aforementioned attendance asterisks. One win is by no means a saving grace for White, who will need to repeat the feat in a crucial Week Six battle with 2-3-0 Brown to finally find themselves clear of the cut line. Neon will welcome back The Albatross™ (Hepler), and should be considered HEAVY favorites against the only remaining winless team in the league (Grey) as the second half of the Summer 2025 season kicks off this Sunday.

Live & Kicking

Captain Nick Meglich’s ‘Live From 4S, It’s Sunday White!’ finally made it past the table reads and dress rehearsals, and put together a solid Sunday sketch. While their 2-2 tie with Grey didn’t bring down the house as hoped, it was an encouraging sign for a talented team that is still looking for a big punch line as we arrive at the midpoint of the Summer 2025 season…

I’ve taken more and more to amusing myself (or, trying to…I’m not all that funny) by ‘theming’ some of the games as the season rolls along. Brown v Pink always gives me a dirty chuckle, we did the ‘Civil War’ earlier this season with Royal Blue v Grey, and Week Four kicked off with the ‘Stop & Go Throwdown’™ between Captain Wendy Enright’s Red, and Captain Bao Nguyen’s Green. The theme works on the obvious level, but could also be (loosely, and admittedly, lamely) applied to the season arc for both teams. Enright & Company were stopped 2-1 by Baby Blue in Week One, started to gas up with a 4-1 Week Two win over Grey, then hit the skids again…and were unceremoniously T-boned 5-1 by Neon in Week Three. Captain Nguyen’s Green were idled 3-2 by Neon in their opener, revved to a 3-1 win over Purple in their second outing, and kept the gas pedal down in a 4-1 Week Two win over White. As the two approached the Week Four intersection, one or the other would surely have the right of way. Or, perhaps they would both sit, frustrated, both unwilling to yield their respective polite/yielding stance…waving at one another to ‘GO!’. Jon Zygleman lurched Red forward first with his fourth of the season at 1:35 in the first (Tim Vick & Trevor Vick), but (as often happens in the real world), had to slam on the brakes (and horn) as Brennen Abel got Green going less than a minute later (Nick Vacchio). The 1-1 tie up would last to the break, into the second, out of the second, into the third, and out of the third…all stop and no go for either team the rest of the way, as neither Sean Kelly (19/20) and (Jon Cima’s stand-in) Chuck Bender (15/16) would allow any further traffic beyond the goal line. So…not a disastrous Sunday drive for either side…just a very safe and sound spin that was neither loss, nor win. Both teams remain somewhere in the middle pack of cars, with Green looking to regain their speed against a tough Pink side, and Red hoping to slide back into a winning lane against a poky, but plucky Royal Blue as we hit the halfway point of our SDFHL Summer road trip.

Keeping with the ‘themed games’ theme, adding the lucrative twist of onboarding some big money sponsors, and very much befitting the fact that it took place on Fathers Day, the second game on the Week Four slate would be the ‘Gerber Gender Reveal Rumble’. Captain John Boddy’s Pink came in as one of only two remaining undefeated teams, while Captain Rob LaVigne’s Baby Blue had only recently fallen out of that exclusive club, and hoped to rebound and pass the experience of a first loss on in the process. I will grant you that there are two important pieces missing from the ‘Gerber Gender Reveal Rumble’…one being an actual Gerber sponsorship, and the second being a handy set of expectant SDFHL parents who could put some stock in the outcome of this tilt as an indicator of what color to paint the nursery. For the sake of this recap, let’s pretend that we at least have the latter in place, with the added twist that the little bundle of joy in question will be named after the player of the game. Captain Boddy got the ‘it’s a girl’ vibes going first with his league-leading sixth of the season at 5:12 in the first (Ryan Loughran & Geoff Downes), but the Baby Blue boys battled back with a Gary Peters leveler at 4:48 (Arnold Gonzales), and a Bryan Ossa lead stealer at 4:10 (Luke Wolmer & Captain LaVigne). Peters’ second of the game at 7:30 in the second (Ossa) built the Baby Blue lead to 3-1 before Jackson Tomaszewski cut the edge back to one less than a minute later (Boddy), leaving the new born plumbing truly in question going into the third. Luke Wolmer would notch the lone goal in that third, an unassisted effort with 6:26 remaining to seal the 4-2 win for Baby Blue over Pink, and officially announce to the proud parents that THEY’RE HAVING A BOY! That boy’s name…Gary Junior (the kids can call you GarJu), in honor of the Gary Peters’ two goal performance that led Baby Blue to a big win, and handed Pink their first loss of the season. Chris Tran (17/19) retains godfather rights for another clutch outing, and Bryan Ossa and Luke Wolmer (both with 1 and 1) will be guests of honor at the baby shower. I am setting up a wish list for GarJu, which I will be sharing on the message board sometime in the coming weeks…

I’m all out of ideas to ‘theme’ the remaining games, so I shall henceforth revert to simple, straightforward reporting (unless/until my brain gets distracted by some other squirrel of an idea that I then run with/run into the ground). This match was one of those ‘important’ early/mid season affairs, in that both Captain Sean Bathgate’s 1-2-0 Brown and Captain William Teglia’s 0-2-1 Royal Blue were getting to the point in the season where a team either merges with the rest of the playoff-bound pack, or starts to slide out of the post season picture. A win for Brown would be their second straight, would even their record at 2-2-0, secure a potentially important tie breaker, and push Royal Blue well and truly below the cut line. A win for Royal Blue would redeem their sagging season, secure that same tie breaker, and propel them out of the basement and into the thick of the playoff hunt. Bathgate & Company would be the betting favorites in this one, if for no other reason than much of their opponent’s roster was not present. Captain Teglia himself, Janet Goins, Chad Goins, Tony Thinh, and Silas ‘The Silencer’™ Perks…all out. The last name in that list is a doozie, as we all know how much Perks changes games, but with more than capable sub, Don Tran, suited up in his stead, the ball dropped on middle game of the Week Four slate. Brendan Jew did not waste much time depositing that ball into the back of Brown’s net, scoring at 8:01 (Steph Palomo Schmidt & Jason Northrup), and Jon Salt followed just eleven seconds later (Jew & Northrup) to make it 2-0 Royal Blue before sweat was even broken. Salt added an unassisted strike at 5:17 to put the short-benched side in complete control before Josh Wirt finally issued an unassisted answer at 2:29. Salt would complete his hat trick with 2:35 remaining in the second to restore the three goal lead, but Wirt’s second cut that lead back to two with just 0:45 to go before the second break. Wirt would then cap his own trick with 5:00 to play, and Brown’s press ramped to dizzying heights, to the tune of a TWENTY to five edge in shots in the final period of play. Don Tran (33/36) would not let an equalizer, much less a game-winner past him, though, and with an impressive Brendan Jew effort leading to Palomo Schmidt’s goal at 1:27, Royal Blue had completed the cobbling together of a very impressive first win of the season, 5-3 over Brown. Matt Henderson (15/21) and his ‘Turd Bergenson’ teammates now find themselves at 1-3-0, nestled along the cutline with fellow two-pointers, Grey. Things do not get any easier for Brown this Sunday, as they face a tough Purple side in the early game, while a rebounded Royal Blue will look to maintain their new trajectory in a battle with 1-2-1 record twins, Red.

With Captain Boddy’s Pink finally learning the letter ‘L’ earlier in the evening, Captain Carl Vankoughnett’s Neon stood as the last and lone remaining undefeated team. The rise of young star Darin Cerasuolo had proven more than enough to keep the wins rolling through Week Three in spite of the absence of Justin ‘The Albatross’™ Hepler, and with said large bird out of the lineup once again against a fully-staffed and potentially potent Purple in Week Four, it would take another strong effort from the rest of the Neon flock to stay perfect to the midway point. Captain Carl led by example, notching his third of the season at 1:12 in the first (Darin Cerasuolo & Mark Nagy), and Purple’s answer would come in the form of a solo Zach Siemer effort at 4:54. Unfortunately for Captain Mason Holcomb, that would be the only answer that his mates would muster, and worse yet, Captain Carl had an answer for that answer…his fourth of the season, and second of the game with just twenty-five ticks left in the second (Darin Cerasuolo & Karns). Chuck Bender (21/22) continued his stingy play, both for his actual team and as a super sub, keeping Purple’s offense off the board the rest of the way to preserve the 2-1 Neon win. Neon’s young star recorded the primary assist on both Vankoughnett tallies, giving him the lead in rookie scoring with 3 and 2 through four games. Jim LaGrossa was charged with a double minor for high-sticking with seconds left in this one, and while that is typically not something I would stop to mention, it was THE ONLY PENALTY OF THE NIGHT! I don’t know that this league has ever seen a ZERO PIM slate of five games, and we came seconds away from that feat in Week Four. Captain Mason (23/25) was at least as sharp as the LaGrossa blade that cut Steve Linke’s forehead, but the offense could not find a way to find a way, dropping back to 2-2-0 with the low scoring loss. He and his mates will look to rebound this Sunday against a wounded a wobbly Brown, while Neon will look to capture another Albatross-less victory against winless and listless White.

If I had to assign a ‘theme’ to the Week Four nightcap, it would be ‘The Battle At The Bottom’. Captain Nick Meglich’s White came into their fray with Grey at 0-3-0, the only team with nary a point to show for their efforts to that point. Captain Tyler Winstead’s Grey had managed JUST north of ‘nary’ a point at 0-2-1, so it was safe to say that both teams REALLY wanted (if not ‘needed’) to win this one. Spoiler alert…neither team would win. Whether this turns out to be a case of ‘mutually assured destruction’ come season’s end remains to be seen, but a 2-2 draw was certainly not what was hoped for/needed here for either team. The first period had White liking their chances for a win, with Vance Morra opening the scoring at 4:48 (Rob Gaudio & Janice Darlington), then…after a Kevin Dinino equalizer at 4:26 (Dan Jurgens & Captain Winstead)…scoring a second time at 2:53 to send White to the first beak up 2-1 (Gaudio & Janice Darlington…again). Jurgens fired home a lone wolf lone goal of the second to knot the score at two apiece, and neither Don Tran (15/17) nor Captain Meglich (22/24) would budge from there out. So it goes…the only two remaining winless teams in the league meet…and somehow manage to keep each other winless. Their fourth non-win in as many tries keeps White in dead last at 0-3-1, while the single point does little to improve Grey’s playoff outlook at 0-2-2. The bad news only gets worse for both teams, as Grey will need to find a way to survive and thrive against a 3-1-0 Baby Blue in Week Five, while White will need a REALLY big slingshot, great aim, and likely some luck this Sunday to find a way to fell the only remaining undefeated team, Neon…

Rear View

All but one team are piled up behind Captain Carl Vankoughnett’s ‘CarliforNeons’ on their SDFHL Summer League 2025 commute. The traffic is like, really bad back there. Some teams may consider exiting the 405 at Getty Center Drive, and taking Sepulveda towards Westwood…then making a left at the Rancho’s Tacos on Palm, and cutting trough the Von’s parking lot to Olive, then slipping over to the 10 before the Dodgers game gets out. The alternative would be to win more games, but, like…whatever…

Week Three opened with our Week Two cover team, Captain John Boddy’s 2-0-0 ‘Night At The PinkDeBerry’, taking on Captain Tyler Winstead’s winless ‘It’s Not Grey In A Threeway’. It is certainly still early in the season, but Pink’s 9-2 edge in goals scored coming in had to be a concern for Grey, and the absence of their skipper didn’t exactly help the ‘limit the damage’ outlook against the league’s top offense out of the gate, but…you never know. Well, I do know, actually, because it is five days later, and the box score has been posted since Monday. This one went about as you might have expected, with Captain Boddy breaking the scoring seal at 1:15 in the first, then adding an unassisted second strike eleven seconds later. Boddy’s first was assisted by newcomer-to-our-league-but-certainly-not-to-hockey, Liv Bryant. It was Bryant’s first career SDFHL point…CONGRATULATIONS, LIV! Bryant was not done, though, as she pushed the lead to 3-0 with her first career SDFHL goal at 1:16 in the second…CONGRATULATIONS, LIV! Boddy and team namesake, Matt DeBerry, had the helpers on Bryant’s milestone tally, and Pink rolled into the third with a commanding three goal lead and a 19-9 edge in shots. Boddy would cap his hat trick at 7:46 in the third (Jackson Tomaszewski), and cap the scoring in the process, with Will Heinl (15/15) and Pink cruising to a third straight win to open the season, 4-0 over Grey. Don Tran (20/24) was steady as you like at the other end, but with just two goals to show for now nine periods of play, it is no wonder that Grey has yet to hit the win column. Winstead & Company now sit at 0-2-1, sharing cut line real estate with Royal Blue as we enter into the middle third of the season. Obviously, nothing is a ‘must win’ at this stage in the proceedings, but anything but a win over dead last White this Sunday would be devastating for Grey. Pink, by contrast, are already closing in on the typical ‘magic number’ of nine points to lock up a playoff spot, and will face what should be a good challenge in Will Heinl’s other team, Baby Blue, this weekend.

Captain Sean Bathgate’s ‘Turd Bergenson’ were Pink’s first victim of the season, a 6-2 drubbing that the victors used as a springboard into a strong start, and left Brown wondering aloud if they were in for the proverbial ‘long season’. A much closer loss to Neon in Week Two (a game in which Brown had the better of the play) was encouraging, but moral victories do not count in the standings, and Bathgate & Company set out to snatch their first win from the jaws of a third straight undefeated opponent in Captain Rob LaVigne’s ‘MacBlueber’. As fate would have it (because fate apparently hates Brown), Baby Blue would have both of their biggest offensive weapons in the lineup for this match, with Luke Wolmer making his season debut alongside super stud speedster sniper, Kalen Hunter. Cue the inspirational underdog music, which simmered in a scoreless first, but swelled a bit with Mark DeGraffenreid’s first goal of the season…a strange sequence in which super sub Don Tran played a dumped ball softly behind his own net, only to have DeGraffenreid collect it, wrap it, and deposit it to make it 1-0 Brown with 1:37 to play in the second. The underdog music clicked up a few notches with DeGraffenreid’s second of the game, a blind, spin around wrister from the half boards that found twine to make it 2-0 (Josh Wirt & Chris Tran), and LaVigne & Company never did strike a chord of retaliation, with Chris Tran’s (literal) last second empty-netter sealing a big 3-0 win for Brown over Baby Blue. Matt Henderson (19/19) (shout out to one of the most loyal front page readers in the league) was superb in his return from injury, keeping a stout offense off the board throughout to finally lift his mates out of the basement and into the win column. Don Tran (15/17) was sharp in a sub stint for Chris Tran…who was not in nets for Baby Blue because he was busy notching 1 and 1 against his other team…such a twisted little league we have. Brown will hope to even their record at 2-2-0 this Sunday as they clash with Captain Teglia’s 0-2-1 Royal Blue, while Baby Blue will need to regain their scoring touch, and hope for a triumphant return for ‘The Prodigal Tran’™ as they take on budding juggernaut, Pink.

Our Week Three cover team took to the court next, with Captain Carl Vankoughnett’s ‘CarliforNeons’ hoping to defend their perfect record against Captain Wendy Enright’s 1-1-0 ‘Gilda Redner’. Neon’s perfect start had not been the result of the kind of dominance that fellow attic dwellers, Pink, had established in their first third, with a 3-2 win over Green in Week One followed by an empty-net-aided 3-1 topping of Brown. So, with Justin ‘The Albatross’™ Hepler and Mark Nagy out of the lineup, Captain Carl probably didn’t love his team’s chances of keeping pace with Boddy’s Bunch…until he arrived to find that Red would be without the services of three of their best. Andy Strathman, Jon Zygelman, and Owen Perks were all elsewhere as warmups wrapped, and the rest of Neon’s scoring stars commenced lip licking, hoping to pounce on a short-benched, powered-down opponent. Neon did just that, but it was a new hero doing most of the scoring on his way to a sparkling POTW performance. Enter young Darin Cerasuolo…teenaged son of veteran blueliner and proud papa teammate, Anthony. Darin struck first for Neon at 2:58 in the first (Vankoughnett & Jim LaGrossa), then, after LaGrossa’s first of the season made it 2-0 at 1:19 (Vankoughnett), added his second with just ten clicks left before the break (Vankoughnett & LaGrossa). These were Darin Cerasuolo’s first and second career points, and first and second career goals in the SDFHL…CONGRATULATIONS, DARIN! Tim Vick responded for Red at 6:19 in the second (Trevor Vick & Joe Nguyen), but any hopes of a Red rally were quickly snuffed by Captain Vankoughnett’s second of the season at 5:22 (LaGrossa). The third period featured just one goal, and that one goal belonged to ‘DC’…Darin Cerasuolo completing his first career SDFHL hat trick at 9:47 (Vankoughnett & Shelby Shattuck), and providing some not-so-needed padding…CONGRATULATIONS, DARIN! Incredibly enough, a near weaponless Red managed to outshoot Neon 21-14, but Chuck Bender (20/21) was up to the task, keeping Neon comfortable throughout in a smooth and easy 5-1 win. Jon Cima (9/14) suffered the loss for Red, who fall below .500 for the first time this season at 1-2-0. Perks’ attendance projection was a known cause for concern for Captain Enright coming in, and the big gun is slated to miss his second straight this Sunday in a key middle ground matchup with Captain Bao Nguyen’s Green. Vankoughnett & Company will look to stay perfect against Purple in another Hepler-free week, but with the rise of the Darin Cerasuolo, the Sunday forecast is looking bright for Neon this season, with or without ‘The Albatross’™

Jerry Gonzales suffered a knee injury at some point in the Wing League 2025 Final, and he was sorely missed while nursing that sore knee back into a usable state over White’s first two weeks of play. Captain Meglich was sharp in nets in both the 2-0 Week One loss to Purple and the 3-2 Week Two loss to Pink, but with J-Gon gone, and presumed one-two punch of Rob Gaudio and Eric Willard accounting for just one goal and one assist combined through two games, White found themselves edging towards desperation coming into a Week Three showdown with Captain Bao Nguyen’s Green. The good news for White…Gonzales would make his season debut, and while he was reportedly looking a bit limited in his play, the better news is that he scored a goal. The bad news for White…that Gonzales goal at 9:21 in the third (Gaudio & Willard) was the only goal they would manage. The worse news…Green scored four. Newcomer Dave Bourgouin put Green on the board bright and early, scoring his first career SDFHL goal at 7:39 in the first (Brennen Abel & Mostafa Azab). CONGRATULATIONS, DAVE! Abel would follow with one of his own less than two minutes later to make it 2-0, then provide the primary assist on Sadie Hellstrom’s second of the season at 1:36 (Bourgouin with the second assist…his first career SDFHL assist). A scoreless second led up to the aforementioned Gonzales response early in the third, and Hellstrom capped the scoring with an empty-netter with 0:02 to play (Bourgouin). Sean Kelly (15/16) was his customary studly self in the 4-1 Green win, while Captain Meglich (24/27) and White were left with a third straight loss to start the season, and (worse) the sinking feeling that this might just be the tip of the losing ice berg. Now dead last, and the only team without a point in the standings, Meglich & Company will need to begin their scramble to playoff safety this Sunday against an 0-2-1 Grey. A win would not only bounce them off the bottom of the standings board, but might inject some much needed confidence into the ranks. Green, meanwhile, will look to improve on their 2-1-0 record and move firmly into the upper crust of the standings with a win over 1-2-0 Red in the ‘Stop & Go Showdown’ to open Week Four.

Two similarly-shaded sides played under the lights to wrap the Week Three night, with Captain William Teglia’s 0-1-1 Royal Blue taking on Captain Mason Holcomb’s 1-1-0 Purple. Both teams had managed just two total goals in their first two outings, with the former having tied 1-1, then lost 5-1, and the latter having won 2-0, then lost 3-0. Any team backed by Silas ‘The Silencer’™ Perks can remain confident that they will compete even in lean offensive times, but with Perks out of the lineup for a second straight week, it would be up to ‘The OG Silencer’™, Sean Kelly, to prevent an offensive awakening for Purple and propel Royal Blue to their first win of the season. Considering the offensive anemia plaguing both teams coming in, this one was much wilder and looser than you would have predicted. Jon Salt broke the scoring seal with his second of the season at 4:30 in the first (Tony Thinh), and ‘Da Kid’ did his part in stemming the Purple pushback, in spite of facing twelve shots to his counterpart’s five. The same Salt-Thinh combo accounted for the game’s second goal, swelling the positive vibes on a short Royal Blue bench at 7:18 in the second. Joe Malki was first to answer for Purple at 7:00 (Chris Malki), and Christopher Fiore was second just 0:45 later (Chris Malki & Shawna Hamon) to knot the score at twos going into the second break. The first half of the third ground along with Purple punishing Royal Blue with pressure and shots (ultimately winning the shot battle by a gross 35-10 margin), but Kelly kept his temporary mates in the game as well as you could expect from any goalie, The Silencer™ included. The building pressure finally produced Purple’s first lead of the game, with Zach Siemer converting a Craig Russell feed into paydirt with 5:50 to go. Chris Malki’s tenacious effort in front produced a blue collar boost to 4-2 at 4:14 (Joe Malki & Hima Joshi), and an absolutely unreal laser from the point off the stick of Russell made it 5-2 Purple with just 0:47 to play (Steve Linke & Fiore). Tony Thinh would cap a valiant three point night with his first of the season on a quick put-back with 0:18 to play, but Captain Holcomb (7/10) and Purple would hold on for the 5-3 win. Captain Teglia would get the news of his team’s second defeat in three tries via text, as he, Janet Goins, Chad Goins, Steph Palomo Schmidt, and (or course) Silas Perks were all elsewhere on June 8th. Kelly would finish with a 30/35 line, and I am confident that Perks could not have done more, especially in the second game of a back-to-back. Perks will be out again this Sunday, and Royal Blue will turn to Don Tran to backstop a better result against Brown. Purple will hope to keep the scoring hand hot and hand Neon their first loss of the season as we enter into the middle stretch of the Summer 2025 campaign.

No Panic At The Disco

Captain John Boddy’s ‘Night At The Pinkbury’ looked like they might get bounced from the ultra exclusive ‘Undefeated Club’ after White threw two drinks in their faces early, but Boddy and his wingfolk found their rhythm and found a way to score…a threesome for the win…UP TOP!

Week Two opened with our cover team, Captain John Boddy’s ‘Night At The Pinkbury’, taking on Captain Nick Meglich’s ‘Live From 4S, It’s Sunday White!’. The former came in as the only team to record a truly convincing win in Week One, having dispatched Brown 6-2 in their opener, in spite of being outshot by a slim margin (21-19), while the latter suffered a close loss (2-0) to Purple, in spite of being outshot by a huge margin (26-8). The absence of very valuable veteran, Jerry Gonzales, was certainly part of the problem in that opening loss for White, and Captain Meglich would need his (still Gonza-less) offense to actually provide actual offense in their second outing, lest they suffer the same frustrating fate. Right on cue, Tom ‘The Other’ Darlington cashed in on the powerplay at 8:11 in the first (Rob Gaudio) to give White their first lead of the season on their first goal of the season. When Eric Willard made it 2-0 just over a minute later, it seemed that White had put a stop to their scoring schnide, hit their stride, and were on their way to a big bounce back win. Alas, Captain Boddy had another middle and ending in mind for this story. Pink’s captain provided his team’s first response at 3:09 in the first (Jason Lee & Parsa Mostafavi), then provided the second assist on the lone goal in the second (Geoff Downes from Jackson Tomaszewski and Boddy), bringing about an up for grabs final period with the teams knotted at twos. It was Boddy again at 3:05 in the third (Tomaszewski & Elyse Shattuck) giving his team their first lead of the game, and the only lead they would need, as Will Heinl (14/16) and Pink hung on for their second win in the first two weeks of play, 3-2 over White. Captain Meglich (20/23) absorbed another hard luck, high hopes loss, and while removing the goose egg from the goals column is encouraging, White will clearly need to find a way to generate more offense as we close out the first third of the season this Sunday.

The Blues Brothers Battle™ was up next on the docket, with Captain William Teglia’s 0-0-1 Royal regiment squaring off with Captain Rob LaVigne’s 1-0-0 Baby batch. LaVigne & Company made the front page in Week One, with Chris Tran (33/34) heroics and JUST enough scoring punch combining to produce one of the most improbable wins in recent memory. With top gun Kalen Hunter returning, Baby Blue hoped they would not need another water tight Tran turn against their color cousins to stretch their win streak to two, while Royal Blue knew they would likely need more than the lone goal they managed in their opener to make their way into the win column. It was Will Heinl, fresh off his second win in nets to start the season for Pink, to act first, putting Baby Blue on the board at 4:00 (Bryan Ossa). The booming long range shot of Jon Salt equalized for Royal Blue at 2:33 (Tony Thinh), but Kalen Hunter checked in with his first of the season at 1:12 to match his dear old dad in goals and wrest the lead back for the lighter blues at 1:28 (Leah Gonzales & Gary Peters). A scoreless second saw Baby Blue outshoot Royal Blue 13-7, but Nick Meglich (playing in his second game of THREE on the night) kept his surrogate side just one back going into the third. That third belonged entirely to Baby Blue, with Kalen Hunter’s second at 6:27 finally offering some breathing room (Leah Gonzales & Captain LaVigne), Bryan Ossa adding more padding at 3:04 (Leah Gonzales), and Ossa’s second in less than a minute making this a boat race at 2:23 (Arnold Gonzales). So…as one might have predicted…more offense for Baby Blue in Kalen’s return, less stress on a less-tested, but no-less-terrific Chris Tran (20/21), and another one goal night for Royal all added up to a 5-1 win for the paler Blue twin. Meglich (27/32) can only be applauded for his efforts, and lauded for his dedication to the league, as he remained suited up for his THIRD game of the night…a second sub stint, this time filling in for Brown’s Matt Henderson…

Captain Sean Bathgate’s ‘Turd Bergenson’ was the only team to get truly wiped and flushed in Week One, with their 6-2 loss to Pink standing out starkly on a slate of very close, very low-scoring games. If Brown were to have any hope of avoiding the same fate for two weeks straight, they would need to contain the considerable arsenal at Neon Captain Carl Vankoughnett’s disposal, particularly The Albatross™, Justin Hepler. Hepler’s triumphant 2 and 1 return to league play served as the foundation (and most of the rest of the construction) of a 3-2 win over Green. With plenty of other guns, Brown down a key defender in John Kushneryk, and Nick Meglich staggering into the crease for his third straight game, the odds were squarely in favor of ‘The CarliforNeons’. Odds can often be evened out, though, especially with the small sample size of one prior game, and Brown came out on the front feet in the opening period, outshooting Neon 9-3. Shots may be something of a barometer, but they don’t count for wins and losses, and Neon survived through a scoreless first ten to produce two shots (out of their second period total of twelve) that actually counted in the second. Ramsey Ksar struck first at 5:21 (Pat Gladstone & Justin Hepler), and Captain Vankoughnett doubled the damage less than a minute later (Jim LaGrossa). Holding Hepler to just one helper through two periods of play was certainly encouraging, but a two goal hole is a two goal hole, and Brown would need to start climbing out of that hole early in the third, or find themselves buried with another early season loss. Josh Wirt threw a rope down to his mates with 6:40 to play (Marc Lapointe & Captain Bathgate), and while Brown continued to press (outshooting Neon once again in the third, 12-8), they could not get Bender to break for a second time. Pat Gladstone shoveled a loose ball the length of the rink with Meglich (finally getting a rest) on the bench for an extra attacker, and her empty netter (Mark Nagy) would seal the deal, putting Neon up for good 3-1 with 1:10 left. There was some squawking about whether or not Gladstone’s second of the season actually went in, with many eyes on and off the court suggesting it actually hit the post and bounced away, but the goal would stand, and Brown would never find a second, anyway. Chuck Bender (31/32) earned first star honors for his second win of the season, and Nick Meglich (21/23) was still REALLY good in his seventh, eighth, and ninth periods of hockey on the evening. The loss keeps Brown in dead last going into Week Three…not a good place to be in when set to face an undefeated Baby Blue, while Neon will hope to defend their own undefeated position against the 1-1-0 Red.

With all of the praise and press piled on Perks (‘The Silencer’™) over the past three years, it is easy to forget about the original king of the goalies…a living legend whose legacy is still being written…Sean ‘Da Kid’ Kelly. You are very rarely out of a game with Kelly as your last line of defense, and while Captain Bao Nguyen’s Green did lose their opener to Neon, they remained confident coming into their second game of the season against Captain Mason Holcomb’s Purple. Holcomb was forced to sit out of his team’s opener with illness, but was well enough to watch with pride as his team topped White 2-0. The storyline was set…the return of the relative newcomer and first time captain to the crease to duel with an SDFHL demigod at the other end…winner take all (all two points…that’s it…winner take all two points). That storyline morphed into two storylines, both of them featuring Green heroes doing heroic things to bring glory to Green. Brennen Abel was the first of those heroes, scoring first at 4:45 in the first (Emily Bennington & Mostafa Azab), second unassisted with seconds left in the first, and third at 5:11 in the second (Vacchio) to push Green to a 3-0 lead. Meanwhile, our second storyline was simmering, with Kelly having stopped 14/14 through two. Purple (apparently) went off for SIXTEEN shots in the third, but Kelly would stop every one of those shots, bringing his epic effort to a 30/30 wrap, and capping a crazy 3-0 win for Green. I use the term ‘crazy’, because Purple outshot their victorious foes 30-12, and yet…nothing at all to show for it…THAT’s the work of a ‘Silencer’™, and his name is not Silas. Captain Holcomb (9/12) would have liked a better result in his personal debut as a captain, of course, but can take solace in the fact that his team ran into a hot goalie serving up an ice cold loss. Both 1-1-0 teams will take on winless sides this Sunday, with Green facing off against White, and Purple looking to rediscover their scoring touch against Royal Blue.

The nightcap matched two winless teams, with Captain Wendy Enright’s ‘Gilda Redner’ having fallen victim to Chris Tran’s monster effort in a 2-1 Week One loss, and Captain Tyler Winstead’s ‘It’s Not Grey In A Threeway’ having battled to a 1-1 draw with ‘The Silencer’™ and Royal Blue in their first go of the season. So, both teams had mustered just one goal the Sunday prior, and both were thwarted by strong goaltending efforts at the other end, but Red had to feel particularly pent up after having nothing to show for a 34-12 advantage in shots in their debut. It’s also worth mentioning that the runaway scoring leader from last season was held to one assist in Red’s first game, and keeping Owen Perks goal-free for a second straight game is not a task that Don Tran and his Grey mates were looking forward to taking on. Perks did contribute in the first period, but again as a setup man for Jon Zygelman at 1:52. The 1-0 first period lead for Red became a 2-0 lead with Zygelman’s second of the game at 4:33 in the second (Trevor Vick), then 3-0 with Zygelman’s unassisted hat trick capper at 4:10 in the second. Captain Winstead & Company had accomplished the primary goal of keeping Perks at zero goals on the season, but JZ had clearly picked up that torch and scorched Grey’s hopes for a winning effort. A taped-together Jordan Pynn finally posted a response to the Zygelman outburst, cutting the lead to 3-1 at 4:27 with his first of the season (Dan Jurgens), but…finally…Owen Perks broke his season scoring seal to restore Red’s lead and extinguish any chance of a daring comeback. Zygelman accounted for the lone assist on Perks’ goal, leaving him with a brilliant 3 and 1 line for the game. Were it not for Sean Kelly’s 30/30 win-stealing performance for Green, JZ would have been a no-brainer choice for POTW. Jon Cima (11/12) was considerably less tested than Don Tran (25/29) in Red’s 4-1 win, but math was finally in Red’s favor, as their lopsided shot totals translated to a convincing win the second time around. Grey sit nestled with Royal Blue just above the cut line at 0-1-1, but also share a lowest goals-for total of two with three other teams (White, Purple, and Royal Blue). They will need to find more scoring this Sunday for sure, as they face the team with the highest goal output through two weeks of play…Pink (9).