Schrutes & Ladders

Well, if you read the caption above, you already know that nothing went to plan in Week Eleven for Captain Joel Gattey’s White side. The odds were ever in their favor coming in, as White had not one, but two head-to-head tie breakers in their back pocket, meaning even a loss to Black would not (in and of itself) be the end of the line, so long as Green OR Neon also lost. Lining up with four players out (Captain Gattey, Jerry Gonzales, Jon Zygelman, and Parsa Mostafavi) would have most teams on edge, but when your last line of defense if Silas ‘The Silencer’ Perks, you have a chance to win no matter what math and logic may have to say about it. Not only had Perks’ team never failed to make the playoffs, they had never failed to make the Final! Captain Rob Gaudio and ‘Threat Level Midnight’ looked to subvert that trend and punch their own playoff ticket, and it was the captain himself that got the ball rolling for Black in the first (from Wendy Enright and Kyle Snyder). Snyder cashed in on the powerplay in the second (from Gaudio and Mason LaGrossa) to add some pad, but the first one was all that super sub Nick Vacchio (12/12) would need against a stripped down White attack. Perks (31/33) did indeed give his team a chance to win with another heroic performance, but the lack of personnel and punch was too much to overcome, and Black would move on to February play with a 2-0 win while White would have to hope for some help to avoid being the last team out…

Captain Mark Nagy and ‘The Money Beets’ just never seemed to have enough this season. Ties that ‘should have been wins’, losses that ‘should have been ties’, and blowouts that ‘should have been closer’…too much ‘should’, and not nearly enough ‘good’. When you roll into the final week of play with nothing to gain, you also have nothing to lose. Captain Jon Salt’s ‘Bluesnickel’ was in a similar position…just at the other end of the standings. A win would only serve to shore up their second seed spot, while a loss could only knock them down one peg. Still…I like to think that most (if not all) SDFHLers play with pride, and play to win, regardless of the stakes, and as much as they stumbled and fumbled their way down the vault runway, Purple really wanted to stick the landing on a tough season. Blue did not seem to miss a beat in the absence of Captain Salt and Mark Ennsmann, with Greg Wirth opening the scoring (from Kevin Wilkinson), then Wilkinson doubling the damage less than two minutes later. Wilkinson made it 3-0 early in the second (from Joe Nguyen and Maureen Ruchhoeft), and whatever pride and ‘play to win’ passion within Purple players hearts was put to one final test. *cue inspirational sports movie music* That’s when the leash came off the scoring lions for Purple….Captain Nagy from TK Mason and Josh Wirt at 5:02, Mark DeGraffenreid unassisted at 4:31, DeGraffenreid from Nagy and Craig Russell at 2:07, and Josh Wirt unassisted at 1:03…four goals in less than four minutes, as Purple FINALLY found that surge they had been so sorely lacking all season. Wirt added an insurance marker early in the third, and DeGraffenreid completed his first hat trick since the Mesozoic Era late (from Nagy and Ian Crooks) to cap a wild and wonderful 6-3 win for Purple which, while ‘meaningless’, meant a lot for a good group that fought hard to the bitter end. Chris Tran (16/19) finally got the goal support he needed/deserved in the win, while Nick Vacchio (15/21) will look to shake off two straight losses (Blue’s only L’s on the season) and get his team back on track in their playoff opener versus #6 Gold.

Captain Kyle Prior’s Grey had an even worse winter than Purple, sitting alone in the standings basement at 2-7-0 coming into Week Eleven…just playing out the string in a game with no meaning at all for them (minus the aforementioned pride), and a mountain of meaning for their opponent. Captain Sean Bathgate’s Neon knew that one point would punch their ticket after watching White fall by the wayside, but a loss would absolutely leave them in jeopardy of a cut line catastrophe, with White wielding the all-important tie breaker totems. David Schlatter is, well, a fucking beast. his 22 points coming in had him just behind Red’s John Boddy for the season scoring title. His goal to open the scoring in this one at 6:49 in the first put him in a tie in that race, and put Neon out in front, 1-0. Jordan Pynn would equalize for Grey less than thirty seconds later, but Carl Vankoughnett would restore Neon’s edge at 5:34 (from Weston Nawrocki). Brandon Olsen (from Captain Prior) drew the underdogs level again in the second, setting up a winner-take-all third. Captain Bathgate recaptured the lead for his team (from Matt Gottfried), and Schlatter doubled the trouble for Grey with his second of the game at 6:32 (from Bathgate). Andy Strathman kept Grey alive with a response just thirteen clicks later, but Schlatter would complete his hat trick in the late going (from Chris Fiore) to finish the season atop the scoring charts with 17 and 8, and finish (an already finished) Grey 5-3. Cory Brin (28/33) was on the busier end of the rink in yet another hard luck loss, while Chuck Bender (20/23) and Neon knew that they had done what they needed to do to make it out of January alive. With the Gottfrieds (Kaity and Matt) departing (BEST WISHES, YOU TWO!), Neon’s new recruits (Julie Ott and Jackson Tomaszewski) are in place and ready for playoff play. Neon will face second-seeded Red in their opener, or what the media is calling ‘The Battle: Boddy v Schlatter’…get your popcorn ready!

Green’s gutty, grindy Week Ten draw against Purple was as important as it was improbable. Of course, Purple proved to be pretty powerless over the course of the season, but starting any game with just five players and a goalie, then losing one of those five player in the second period usually spells L. That one Week Ten point, coupled with White’s Week Eleven loss, meant that Green could squeak into the postseason with anything but a loss against a potent and poised Red side. A scoreless first had Green hopeful (any period without a point for John Boddy is a major win), and a strong second had them in control. It was Captain Luke Wolmer leading the way, converting on the powerplay at 7:19 (from birthday boy old man, Chris Malki), then building the lead with his second at 6:02 (from Ramsey Ksar and Jason Lee). The shots kept piling up for the Captain Linke-led favorites, but Sean ‘Da Kid’ Kelly (33/33) was in HOF form from start to finish in this one. A full court empty-netter from the elder Malki was icing on his birthday cake, and extra reason to exhale for Green, who had limped and labored for much of the season, but won when they needed to…a 3-0 slide past the second seed, and into the final playoff position. Jon Cima (20/22) finished the season with a strong (enough) 5-3-1/.862/2.00/2 SO line, while Boddy’s blanking dropped him out of the top spot in the scoring race (no doubt making him eager for playoff vengeance). Green’s big win was a big loss for White, who became the final victim of regular season play. Captain Wolmer & Company can only bask in the glory of making the playoffs for so long…they have a date with top-seeded Orange out of the gate. Red held on to their second seed in spite of the loss (thanks to Blue’s loss to Purple), and will face new-player-laden Neon in their playoff opener this Sunday.

With the playoff pool settled, the night cap (and final game of the regular season) would serve as a mere postseason appetizer for both Gold and Brown. Still, both sides had secured wins in their previous two games coming in, and continuing any momentum at this point in the proceedings is never a bad thing. A scoreless first saw Gold outshoot Brown 8-1, but Nick Meglich was up to the task, and zeroes were the heroes going into the second. Andrew Jacobsen, still in the scoring title sweepstakes coming in, put Gold on the board at 8:31 in the middle frame (from Matt Groe), and Gold continued to pour on the pressure with nine more shots (to Brown’s four). The third period was the twist, though, with Brennen Abel bringing Brown back to even footing (from Dan Soar) at 8:06, then finding the game-winner (also from Soar) with 3:18 to play. Tempers flared quite a bit at this point, but (sadly) the most flared temper was that of a certain referee that I have known my entire life…you might say we are really close. After the shock and awe of that outburst had subsided, the game continued, and Meglich (19/20) made sure that Brown remained in winning form, prevailing over Gold 2-1 to vault over FOUR other teams and into the four seed. Gold was one of those four jumped-over teams, but even with the loss, they held of to the six seed based on the ‘total wins’ tie breaker over both Neon and Green. Don Tran was not in nets for his team in this one, but Sean Kelly (11/13) absorbed the loss in a fill-in performance, giving him a personal line of 44/46 with a win and a loss on the evening. Captain Kaitlyn Brusso and Gold will look to avenge a 4-2 Week Two loss, and extend Blue’s rather unexpected two game losing streak, while Captain Rob LaVigne and Brown will also be bent on revenge, facing a Black team that bested them 6-3 back in Week Six.