Kill Or Be Killed

Chris Tran FINALLY made his debut in nets for Gold, after missing his team’s first half dozen games with old man knees. Tran was very sharp, but as the story has gone for most of the bottom teams in the standings this season, poor attendance dulled any hopes of making his efforts pay off. Without the services of Alan Razoky, Ty Pereira, Harsh Wanigaratne and Matt Groe, Gold’s only hope would be to somehow steal a lead, and hold on for dear life. Captain John Boddy’s Black fired twenty shots at Tran in the first two periods, but it wasn’t until late in the second when one finally found a way past the veteran netminder…Marc LaPointe’s first goal (and, indeed, point) of the season off a wild, bouncy, post-and-out rebound play with helpers to Pat Gladstone and Sean Bathgate. The third period was ALMOST as quiet as the first, with Gold pushing in vain to equalize (finally topping Black in shots in a period with a 9-8 edge), but Brendan Jew (from Captain Boddy) ended any comeback hopes for Captain Jeannine Stuzka’s desperados, capping a 2-0 Black win with his second of the season. Tran finished with a 26/28 line…definitely giving his team his all, and keeping their slim hopes of a non-loss alive to the bitter end, while Ryan Loughran (15/15) earned all of his money in the third period push from Gold, holding strong to earn his first career shutout and improve Black to 4-1-2. If this game wasn’t quite a ‘must win’ for Gold, their remaining three games absolutely are. At 1-6-0, they will need to run the table, and probably rely on some help to survive into July. The biggest challenge left on their schedule comes in the form of Purple this Sunday. If they can manage and upset in that one, they have a beatable pair in Orange and Teal to follow. A loss to Purple will almost certainly mean that Gold will be the first team out.

The Salt Bros Battle™ is always a hot ticket, and with Zach’s 5-2-0 Brown looking to stay in the hunt for the top seed, and Jon’s Purple hoping to shore up their playoff footing, the Spring 2024 regular season installment had plenty to offer beyond Sunday dinner bragging rights for the two superstars. Captain Sev Brown’s bench was barely there, with Tyler Winstead, Jason Northrup, and Juan ‘Always Gone’ Ortiz elsewhere at game time, while Captain Kyle Prior’s Brown would be without Andy Strathman, Shawna Hamon, Maureen Ruchhoeft, and Cory Brin. Of course, all but Strathman would be covered by subs (Sadie Hellstrom, Pat Gladstone, and Ryan Loughran, respectively), so Brown would once again enjoy a wo/manpower advantage over their rivals in Week Ten. The first period saw Purple carry the majority of the play and create more chances, including an open look in the slot that Joe Nguyen did not let pass (from Captain Brown). A scoreless second meant that this grudge match would stay gritty into the third, and when Nguyen cashed in again with 5:55 to play (Salt), it looked like the elder Bro™ would have the latest laugh in the series. Brown kept fighting, though, and a crisp passing series from Zach Salt to Sadie Hellstrom to Mark DeGraffenreid cut the lead back to one with 3:43 to go. Lo and behold, less than a minute later, Robert Pietropaula snapped home his first career SDFHL goal (Hellstrom & Salt) to knot the score, and set up a frenetic fight to the finish. Both Don Tran (17/19) and Ryan Loughran (14/16) held firm the rest of the way, etching a 2-2 sister (or, brother) kiss entry in the Salt Bros Battle™ archives. The salvaged point keeps Brown in first place…for now, and also makes them the first official playoff team with eleven points. They hold the ‘total wins’ and ‘head to head’ tie breaker over Red, but both Olive and Black lurk in striking distance, both with a game in hand. Despite failing to stick the dismount, Purple remain playoff safe at 3-3-1, and will look to improve their security against a down (and nearly out) Gold this Sunday.

From the Salt Bowl to the Dunkin’ Bowl, the Week Ten middle game pitted two struggling sides with a combined two wins, a lot of donuts, and a sprinkling of ties to show for thirteen games played. Attendance (or, lack thereof) has been the story for most of the cut line teams this season, and Captain Janine Ulloa’s Pink had reason to perk up with no Rob Gaudio and no David Schlatter (AGAIN) in the lineup for Orange. The two had combined on 21 of Orange’s 36 points, and 11 of 16 goals, coming in. So, a full-benched Pink (with Pat Gladstone and Kaitlyn Brusso filling in for the absent Captain Ulloa and Steph Palomo Schmidt) would have to be considered the favorites at game time, in spite of having lost their previous two games by a combined score of 15-2. Captain Ulloa may still be grounded with a lower leg injury, but she was beaming with pride early in the first when son Matthew gave Pink an early leg up with his second career goal, and second goal in as many games (from Gordon Schmidt). Super sub, Pat Gladstone, padded Pink’s lead in the second (Greg Wirth & Schmidt), and with the two big Orange guns AWOL, that one really felt like the death knell for Orange. In case there was any doubt, a short-handed strike from Mason LaGrossa with 4:08 to play swiftly removed it, and Lil’ LaGrossa™ followed with the the lone assist on Josh Tran’s second (!) of the season to make it 4-0. Nick Vacchio (11/12) would win The Battle Of The Nicks™, but his shutout bid was undone by a Mostafa Azab conversion with just twelve ticks remaining. The big 4-1 win (amazingly enough) keeps Pink alive in the playoff hunt, but they will likely need to win out after their bye this Sunday in order to make it to the second season. Nick Meglich (23/27) suffered another tough loss to drop his personal record to 1-3-1, and leave Orange down on the cellar steps of the standings at 1-4-2. Captain Bryan Ossa’s group must put that game in hand over Pink to good use this week, but they will REALLY need their stars in the lineup and their stars aligned if they hope to survive an encounter with powerhouse Black.

Attendance is a big deal this season (broken record, I know), but both Rob Gaudio and David Schlatter were in the lineup for Orange in Week Nine against a VERY short Teal side…and Teal still stomped them, 6-2. So, while poor attendance and crippling losses aren’t perfectly corollary, that shocking, lopsided Teal triumph was certainly a glitch in the matrix, and only came courtesy of a monster 3 and 2 performance from Luke Wolmer. The win over Orange gave Captain Zach Siemer & Company hope for a resurrected season, but Captain Ryan Karns’ White had plans of their own to continue their standings ascent. A scoreless first bled into a second period that belonged to the upstart underdogs. Trice Harvey’s second of the season at 8:11 (from Erin Plone) and a fourth on the season for Week Nine POTW, Luke Wolmer (from Chris Malki and Harvey) had Teal on top and in the driver’s seat heading into the final ten minutes of play. To briefly borrow from last season’s theme, and quote the ever-so-quotable Michael Scott…’how the turntables‘. Ramsey Ksar’s second of the season made good on the powerplay for White with 9:30 to play (Carl Vankoughnett & Mark Nagy), and Josh Wirt drew the teams level with a solo effort at 3:42. Both sides pushed hard, producing one of the higher shot totals of any game this season (37-28, in Teal’s favor), but both Matt Henderson and Chuck Bender held strong as the clock wound toward what seemed like a certain draw. Alas, Teal would be undone…Mark Nagy came through with the GWG with just 0:42 to play (Wirt), dealing a crushing blow to Teal’s playoff push with a late stunner…3-2 White over Teal. Bender (34/37) snatched second star honors for his efforts in the losing cause, while Henderson (26/28) and White added another big notch to their mojo belt, and recorded a third straight win to make them officially the ‘hottest team in the league’. Both teams face a steep challenge in Week Eleven, with White grappling with the 4-1-3 Red, and Teal trying again to get on track against the only undefeated team in the league, the 4-0-3 Olive.

At least once a season, there is a game where very little happens. Or, rather, stuff happens, but none of it really means anything, because it doesn’t make the score sheet. Avid fans of very little to no scoring (so, soccer fans, and fans of Carl Vankoughnett’s sex life) would have had Red v Olive circled on their calendar at season’s start, with the league’s top two goalies squaring off in a ‘which team will score the game’s only goal and win this thing’ standoff. As fate would have it, Silas Perks was not in nets for this one, so it would be Nick Meglich v Sean Kelly with the winner claiming sole possession of the top spot in the standings, as well as a potentially valuable tie-breaker, come season’s end. Perks’ absence, coupled with the palpable aura that is ‘Da Kid’ and an ultra-rare Alexis DaCosta sighting gave Red the edge in this one, but Olive has some kind of unbeatable aura of their own going, and this was sure to be a dog fight. Red’s ‘edge’ was evident, at least in the shot totals (23 to Olive 11), but Meglich proved he has a very passable Perks impression, stopping everything Red brought. Kelly was half as tested, but equally effective…that’s right, folks…no goals, no assists, only one penalty (weirdly, on Meglich)…nothing to see here. The 0-0 tie…the first, and likely only one of the season, is actually kind of delicious. Neither team needed a point, let alone a win in the standings, and this result sets up a potential playoff rematch where there are no ties. Both teams officially clinch a playoff berth with the point, but Olive remain the only loss-less team in the league, and are primed to snatch the top seed with a game in hand on both Red and Brown as we roll into the final three weeks of play.