Previously on ‘The SDFHL’, Olive racked up seventeen goals in their first two games, and had the rest of the league wondering how long this ridiculous power surge would last. Short answer/spoiler alert…not long. Captain Tyler Winstead’s gang still found a way to put up numbers, but those numbers were ‘normal’, for once. Also ‘normal’…it was enough to give them a win, keeping them in an elite company of just two, in that regard (cover team, Teal, being the other). Nick Vacchio didn’t get the ‘normal’ memo in this one, building on his impressive early season numbers with his fifth of the season at 0:50 in the first (from a freshly-arrived Alexis DaCosta), and his sixth of the season at 3:54 in the third (from Chris Tullio). He now sits tied for second in goal scoring with Brennan Abel, just one back of his teammate, Kyle Snyder. That was it folks…two Vacchio tallies for Olive…nada, nada enchilada for White. Don Tran (22/22) served that enchilada cold, like his heart, and gunky…like his lungs (seriously, Don…see a doctor, bro), while Nick Meglich (8/10) was tossed to the loss lions in his team’s second scoreless sortie of the season. So, whether they bring the thunder sticks or the tweezers, Olive seems to have what it takes to make wins. White remain right in the thick of things in the middle of the standings in spite of the loss, and will look to even their record against one of only two teams with less goals scored this season, Grey.

The backstory for Captain Carl Vankoughnett’s ‘Yellooow, Newman’ coming into Week Three was ‘consistent/solid offense…bad results’. They fell 8-5 to Olive in their season opener, then 7-4 in the encore. So…maybe adding ‘not the strongest back end’ to that backstory…maybe actually highlight that. Week Three saw a preservation of the ‘consistent/solid offense’ aspect of Yellow’s game, and a reversal of the ‘not the strongest back end’ trend. Jim LaGrossa continued to savor a clutch comeback season, opening the scoring for Yellow with his third goal in as many games (from Scott Wieland), and closing the scoring with his fourth (and Yellow’s fourth of the game…this one from Brennan Abel). Shawna Hamon had evened the score for Blue after LaGrossa’s first (from Josh Wirt), but Abel gave Yellow the lead back for good with just 0:34 to play in the first. LaGrossa and Abel (in that order) set up Scott Wieland’s second period goal, and Jon Cima (10/11) held on for his first career SDFHL win, Yellow over Blue, 4-1…CONGRATULATIONS! Chris Tran (20/24) did his best to keep his team alive, but tensions ran at least as hot as the rink surface throughout the Blue ranks, in a rather flat showing in Captain Rob Gaudio’s absence.

Two teams with equal, but opposite early season histories met in the middle game, with Captain Geoff Downe’s 1-0-1 Red meeting Captain Ian Crooks’ 0-1-1 Black. Red blistered through their Week One opponent 8-0, then survived a meeting with Grey without a loss, in spite of the absence of the bulk of their scoring trust. Black has made an early season habit of failing to capitalize on an opponent’s AWOL awesomeness, losing 5-1 to a Schlatter-less Teal in Week One, then blowing a late lead against a Josh-Wirt-and-Chris-Tran-free Blue in Week Two. Surely Crooks & Company could capitalize on a Red rendezvous sans Justin Ker and Jon Salt…right…maybe…no. Black did play well, with Janine Ulloa and Erin Plone filling in quite capably for Steph Palomo Schmidt and Sadie Hellstrom, and a hot and surly Chris Tran stepping in for Chuck Bender, but Silas Perks was (once again, for the umpteenth time in his career) the great equalizer. Captain Geoff Downes put Red on the board midway through the first with a very slick, swooping, stick-handling dance through Black’s zone, finishing with a chef’s kiss of a backhand past Tran (from Mark Ennsmann and Kevin Dinino). The game wore on from there with Black carrying most of the attack, but finding nothing to show for it. Tran (10/11) held serve, and held his foster team in it to the very end, which, mercifully for Black, was a death bed redemption courtesy of Dan Jurgens. With Tran on the bench for an extra attacker, Jurgens finally solved Perks with just four ticks left on the clock, rifling a seeing-eye shot from distance over an outstretched left pad. It was the only blemish on the day for Perks (27/28), and the only damage dealt by Black, but it was enough just enough in just enough time to produce a 1-1 tie. Red remain undefeated through three weeks, in spite of significant super star attendance issues. Black have yet to win a game, and cannot fall on the same excuse as a crutch…they will just need to be much better the rest of the way, or they will not survive to see the second season.

This season has been so strange…just a lot of bizarre, bloated scores, with boat race blowouts and score-keeper-wrist-cramp-inducing slugfests, sprinkled in amongst ‘normal’, close, low scoring contests. Orange v Purple fell squarely in the ‘score-keeper-wrist-cramp-inducing’ category, with the eleven goals between the two teams matching the total from all eight other teams in four other games on the night. Hima ‘Muthafuckin” Joshi opened the scoring for Orange with her second in consecutive games (from Andrew Jacobsen and Justin Stege), but Ty Pereira answered for Purple less than a minute later (from Zach Salt). The Orange floodgates opened at that point, as the next three goals in Orange’s offensive outburst (which, impressively, featured five different goal-scorers) rattled past in a two minute span. Andy Strathman from Jackson Tomaszewski and Justin Stege at 5:21, Jacobsen from Stege and Jeremy Copp at 4:13, and Captain Josh Tran from Jacobsen and Joshi at 3:21. Just like that…4-1 Orange take a commanding lead into the sec…wait…Zach Salt responds with 0:16 to play in the first to cut the lead to 4-2 (from Jason Northrup). Then…sixteen seconds of scoreless hockey to wrap the period (miracles). Salt would continue, then complete the Purple comeback in the second, with his second of the night at 9:20 (from Pereira), and a solo job at 4:29. Just like that, a 4-4 game going into the third. Trice Harvey continued his impressive sophomore campaign with his second of the season at 8:26 in the final period (although, some observers report that he may well get a SHOE deal out of this particular ‘goal’…if you follow), and that 5-4 edge would hold for Purple into the final minutes of play. Tomaszewski (from Jacobsen) awakened Orange from their twenty minute offensive nap at 1:38, knotting the game at 5-5, and sending everyone home with one poi…nope…another late goal, the FOURTH of the game for Salt (this one from Mark Scelfo), and the (*triple checking the sheet*) game-winner for Purple in a weird and winding first win for Captain Sev Brown’s side, 6-5 over Orange. Jimm Reifsnyder (12/18) slid back in the goalie stat stack with the ice cold six pack of GA Lager, while Ian Crooks (24/29) tasted victory for the first time this season, although (sadly) not with his own team. Honestly, whatever the outcome, neither of these teams looks like a real Cup contender at this point. Still, better to be in Purple’s position at 1-2-0, than Orange’s 0-2-1. There is only one way to go for Captain Josh Tran’s clan, and that is up. Well, if ‘stay right where you are in dead last’ is a direction, then…then there is that direction, as well.

Last, but ironically first (in the standings), Teal…our cover team (I mean, barely ‘cover’ team…*giggity*). Captain Kar…Sorry…we interrupt this recap with a word from our sponsor…

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OK…that was a first, but…we have to keep the lights on somehow. As eerie coincidence (if that is your real name…ALEXA) would have it, that commercial also ties directly into the remainder of this recap! Captain Karns’ led by example, and led off the scoring for Teal midway through the first (from Vinny Santora and John Boddy). Earlier in the period, Ryan TOOK A PENATLY FOR TRIPPING. He wanted to make sure I mentioned that, and we have to keep our advertisers happy here. Santora plumped the lead to 2-0 in the second (from Captain Karns), and that would be all the scoring for either side in this one. It would not, however, be all of the PIMs, as Karns WAS BOOKED FOR INTERFERENCE IN THE THIRD (again, just paying bills here, people). Sean Kelly’s return to de facto Head Ninja Goalie, and VP Of Humane Decapitation has been swift, but not at all shocking. His 17/17 shutout in this 2-0 win over Grey has his numbers at 3-0-0/.970/0.67/1 SO…the sheriff is back, and the sale of ‘Make Da Kid Great Again’ hats are now on back order. Teal looks primed and pumped to preserve their pole position through the remaining two thirds of the season, but as good as they have been, Olive is still right there with them. Tickets to the Week Eight matchup between these two titans are now fetching as much as $3500 in the secondary market. The jury is still out on whether or not Captain Zach Siemer’s Grey are contenders or pretenders. With a sample platter record through three weeks of play (1-1-1), and five of their league low six goals scored coming in a Week One thrashing of a power-compromised Purple, they will definitely need Kalen Hunter to find his tights and cape, posthaste…

Captain Carl Vankoughnett’s ‘Yellooow, Newman’ were the Week One victims of our clobbersaurus cover team, falling 8-5 in what was clearly a tight, defensive struggle. The brightly-clad clan looked to flip the script in Week Two, and maybe hold their opponent to less than an octo-spot. The good news for Yellow…they did manage just that. The bad news…they did manage JUST that. This game was wildly entertaining, and precisely-patterned through most of the first two periods of play. Joe Malki opened the scoring for White (from Mostafa Azab)…Jim LaGrossa responded for Yellow (from Elyse Shattuck and Marc Lapointe). Jordan Pynn for White (from Chris and Joe Malki)…Brennan Abel for Yellow. Papa Malki starts the second period scoring (Lil’ Malki and Emily Bennington)…Scott Wieland brings things back level (LaGrossa and Vankoughnett). Chris Malki again on the power play (Malki and Azab)…Captain Carl with the answer (Brennan and LaGrossa). It was here that the pattern petered out, with White opening a three goal edge with a trio of late second period strikes…Will Heinl at 1:26, Joe Malki at 0:36, and Chris Malki at 0:04 (from Pynn). Then, just as steady as the two period scoring spate had had been, the nets ran dry in the third, leaving White on the winning end of a 7-4 final. So…less than eight goals allowed, but barely, and now FIFTEEN goals allowed in two tries for Yellow and Jon Cima (15/22), who’s first foray into the league has been a falter, thus far. Nick Meglich (24/28) was busier and better at the other end, helping to even his team’s record after their own inauspicious debut (an 8-0 loss to Red). Joe Malki captured POTW honors with a 2 and 3 sparkler, and combined with his dear old dad for 5 and 4 in the impressive bounce back win.

Big numbers and blowouts are already proving commonplace this season, but the Orange v Teal matchup brought us back to a simpler time when Linke was under 60, and the SDFHL draft produced profound parity. Orange was a part of the only such close contest in Week One (a 2-2 tie with Blue), and they continued their trend of tight tilts in Week Two. John Boddy picked up where he left off in a POTW Week One effort (a 5-1 win over Black), putting the first mark on the score sheet with his fourth of the season at 3:11 in the first. David Schlatter followed with his first of the season (he missed Week One with an injury), and Teal carried a 2-0 lead out of the first on the strength of two solo efforts from their super stars. We’ve established that Orange likes a close game, and Hima Joshi cut the lead to one with (by all accounts) a sweet second period slicer past Sean Kelly (from Mike Chiaco and Captain Josh Tran). Joshi is good for about a goal a season, and this one not only looked pretty, but looked to be perfectly timed to prime an Orange comeback charge. Nope…that would be the only offensive juice for ‘Pulp Can Move, Baby!’, as Kelly (21/22) and company shut the door and sealed the 2-1 win to remain perfect at 2-0-0. Jimm Reifnsyder (19/21) remains quite impressive in his big return to league play, ranking just behind big boys Perks and Kelly amongst goalies through two weeks of play.

The proceedings remained plump with parity in the middle match, as two 1-0-0 teams looked to start the season off with a pluses in the win column. Red was hot off an 8-0 thrashing of White, while Grey was pumped after a 5-2 punking of Purple. The hot hands cooled significantly in this one, with even the shot totals meager for both sides. Still, it’s not always about quantity, but quality, and both Matt Henderson (6/7) and Silas Perks (13/14) made the saves they needed to make to keep either side from prevailing in what was ultimately a 1-1 stalemate. Kevin Dinino put Red on the board early in the first (from Mark Ennsmann), and Rob LaVigne struck back for Grey late in the frame (from Bao Nguyen). That’s all she wrote…two goals for two teams who combined for thirteen in their opener. If you’re looking for the obvious explanation for the offensive offset, it’s worth noting that Jon Salt (5 and 3 in Week One) was out for Red, while Kalen Hunter (2 an 0 in Week One) was out for Grey. That’s the typical summer story…absences make the wins grow founder. Sometimes, managing a tie (or better) with your stars on the shelf is what separates contenders from pretenders…

Leave it to our Week Two cover team to bring back the bludgeoning. Olive can now boast back-to-back monster mashes after serving the other nine teams in the league with a second helping of shock and awe. There is actually too much scoring in this one to recap in a traditional manner, so…Kyle Snyder with one goal in each period and a helper on Chris Tullio’s second of the night…Tullio with a hat trick of his own with two in the first and one in the second…Alexis DaCosta with the game-winner and a powerplay insurance marker in the first to go with two assists…Nick Vacchio with one and one…Craig Russell with three apples…and both Wendy Enright and Captain Tyler Winstead making the sheet with a helper apiece. That was just the Olive scoring…nine goals scored, on the heals of scoring eight in their opener…gross. Purple had very little punch back, but did manage to solve Don Tran (8/10) early in the second (Captain Sev Brown from Erin Plone and Trice Harvey), and very late in the third (Mark Scelfo from Harvey). Tran collected his second win of the season in the 9-2 romp, and it would be hard not to, with the ostentatious offensive output in front of him. Syd Costello (14/23) continued her early SDFHL career struggles, now straddled with a 7.00 GAA through her first two games. While it’s extremely unlikely that Olive can maintain this torrid scoring pace, all eyes will be on their Week Three meeting with White (who are hoping Meglich eats an extra helping of Wheaties Sunday morning). Purple’s poor start has them sharing a basement bed with Yellow at 0-2-0. They will need to squeeze past Orange this week, or find themselves in a hole that is too deep for comfort.

The nightcap was whacky, wild, Koolaid style, with a rather sloppy slosh ending in a shocking 4-4 wash. Sadie Hellstrom’s first of the season broke a scoreless standoff at 5:28 in the second (from Mark DeGraffenreid and Dan Jurgens), and DeGraffenreid built the lead to two with a crazy double deflection deposit just thirteen ticks later (Hellstrom and Mark Nagy). Shawna Hamon converted a Rob Gaudio pass into pay dirt to cut the lead in half and set up a tight, tense third. Jurgens’ first of the night had Black breathing easy early in the final frame (DeGraffenreid and Nagy) and his second of the night had Black exhaling after strikes from Tim Hamon (John Gamm) and Rob Gaudio (Tim Hamon) had brought Blue all the way back to even at 3-3. The 4-3 edge looked a lock to hold with the seconds ticking past and Syd Costello out of the net for an extra attacker for her surrogate side. Every second counts, and Janine Ulloa made her chance count (from Gaudio)…batting home a bouncing ball to complete a furious final push from Blue to stave off a loss and produce their second tie in two tries. The lone point is as bitter for Black as it is sweet for Blue, as Captain Ian Crooks’s Crew now find themselves sitting just above the cut line at 0-1-1. Of course, it’s way too early to really consider the cut line crucial, but wasting a win with seconds to play is proven to be playing with fire, no matter when in the season it falls.

It has taken me nearly a week to get to writing the recaps for this delightful double header to the death…I needed that time to fully absorb and digest just how incredible this Cup coda was. The two top teams, both at the top of their game…neither willing to concede even the tiniest piece of space or spare moment from their opponent from start to finish. The ‘start’ was rather startling for the catbird-sitting top seeds, as Owen Perks quickly deposited a ball past his brother to give Charcoal the (very) early edge (from Chris Tran and Captain Shawna Hamon). Zach Salt returned the early period favor for Silver, squaring the score at 8:44 in the middle layer (from Justin Ker and Sadie Hellstrom). Captain Hamon cashed in on the power play at 4:44 (from Tran and Mark Ennsmann), but there was no panic in Silver’s game, and Alexis DaCosta found the counterpunch to level the ledger again with 1:55 to play (from Salt and Matt Gottfried). Neither Silas Perks (16/18), nor Don Tran (18/20) would budge through the remainder of regulation, and a full five of overtime. On to the shootout…where Charcoal shot out Silver’s chance at a one-and-done knock out with a commanding show of nerve and skill. Both Chris Tran and Zach Salt converted in round one, but Salt would be the only shine on Silver’s star in the shootout, while both Kalen Hunter and Mark Ennsmann solved Silas to build a 3-1 lead. Neither Owen Perks nor Alexis DaCosta could find twine, meaning that the shootout (unlike the actual game) ended a bit early, with Captain Hamon and Sadie Hellstrom sitting, rather than shooting. The 3-2 Charcoal coup meant game two…

Sometimes you are good, sometimes you are lucky, and sometimes you are good and lucky. Both teams had proven the ‘good’ part, but Charcoal got some luck mixed in midway through the first period of the final Final game. A very safe, innocent play turned to disaster for Silver, as a Joel Gattey push from behind the net caught the back of Silas Perks’ pad and nestled into the net for a shocking own goal. Bad luck…bad omen…bad start for Captain Audrey Stratton’s side. Chris Tran was credited with the goal, and while it is not going to make his career highlight reel, they all count on the scoreboard. Kalen Hunter made another count on the scoreboard late in the second to build the lead to two, but Silver found the belly fire in the second intermission, and Alexis DaCosta snapped home Silver’s first answer just eleven seconds into the third (from Sadie Hellstrom and Arnold Gonzales). Hunter put his light grey prey at bay with a gut punch response to the DaCosta tally just 0:36 later. It was DaCosta again just over a minute and a half later to once again make it a one goal game, and it was really beginning to look like this Cup would be decided in an all out slug fest. As it went, there was only one slug left…Owen Perks (from Jackson Tomaszewski and Hunter) dropping one more flying elbow on his dear brother to give Charcoal a 4-2 lead they would never relinquish. Don Tran (8/10) was not nearly as busy as his counterpart, Perks (10/14), but he was so steady, and so unshakeable in the shootout in these playoffs…he was top notch. Kalen Hunter was otherworldly in these games, and he would have my support as the Final MVP…just one reporter’s opinion. So, just as many pundits (and the secret prophecy) foretold, this LONG, wet, winding winter season ended with the tiniest of twists…a two seed over the sitting one seed. Congratulations to Captain Shawna Hamon and ‘CoCoal Chanel’, and congratulations to Captain Audrey Stratton and her ‘Silver Foxes’ for a remarkable run, and for their part in one of the best final Sundays in league history!

Captain Kerri Sevenbergen’s Purple, and Captain Maureen Ruchhoeft’s White both took the ‘fits and starts’ road to Week Three of the playoffs, with each team managing just one two-game winning streak coming in, and (consequently) neither team looking like much of a genuine threat to make a deep playoff run. True to form, both teams had a lopsided win, and a narrow defeat in the books coming into their third at-bat, and with elimination on the line, there would be no ‘bounce back’ opportunity for the losing side this time. Patrick Theis was the busier of the two goalies in a scoreless first period, stopping all twelve shots he faced while watching his team muster just five at the other end, but Purple would find their offensive footing first…in the second, with Jon Salt putting the five seed on top (from Mark Nagy and Eric Willard). A newly reborn Jim LaGrossa answered for White with just 0:23 to play in the middle stanza (from Brennan Abel), setting the table for a dramatic third period. The drama raneth over into overtime, with both sides unwilling to budge, but equally unable to overcome with a regulation game-winner in a stalemate final ten. The overtime was short and sweet for Purple, and short and bitter for White, as Salt tucked home a loose ball (from Janine Ulloa and Willard) to send White home, and send Purple on, 2-1. Patrick Theis (24/25) is really starting to show more signs of his father, Alex, and I am not just referring here to his meticulous goal post alignment ritual prior to each period. He is coming into his own, and Purple will need his best to survive a two game Losers’ Bracket gauntlet with Charcoal and Royal Blue in Week Four. Chuck Bender (15/17) and White become the third playoff castoff with the tough loss, ending their season of ups and downs on a particularly crushing down.

While the second game on the slate lacked the edge inherent with an elimination match, the intensity (of which there was plenty) was driven by the ticket to the Final, dangling in wait for the winner of this high powered showdown. The power came from rather unlikely sources for both teams in the first period, as Ramsey Ksar cashed in his first goal of the season to put Silver in front bright and early in the first (from Zach Salt and Sadie Hellstrom), only to have Captain Janet Biggerstaff Goins score her second of the season (from Eric Herrmann and Carl Vankoughnett) five minutes later to level set the ledger going into the second. The rest of the game was more usual-suspect-laden, with Salt (from Justin Ker) restoring Silver’s lead with the lone second period goal, then Ker soloing one of his own to put Silver up 3-1 with just over half a period to play. Eric Herrmann cut the lead to one less than two minutes later (from Ty Pereira), and Glenn Pinto brought Royal Blue all the way back to even (from Vankoughnett and Herman), notching the rare third goal against Silas Perks, and giving his team hope of a comeback coup. The scene was set for one last episode of ‘Herrmann’s Heroics’, as the supernatural sniper looked to go out with an OT titan toppler in his final SDFHL game (yes, folks…he is moving out, and moving on), but…no. Turning back to the ‘unlikely sources’ theme, it was Arnold Gonzales chipping home the kill shot (yes…his first of the season) with 1:26 to play to send the top seeds to their destined destination…4-3 Silver over Royal Blue in OT. Silas Perks (22/25) allowed three, but held firm when it mattered most to collect his tenth win in thirteen outings this season, while Patrick Theis (15/19) was solid, but not show-stealing in a sub stint for Nick ‘Magic’ Meglich. Both teams remain alive in the quest for the Cup, with Royal Blue rested and ready for the winner of Charcoal v Purple in the three team repechage rumble on June 4th, while Silver have the holiday weekend, and Week Four to rest, recover, and refocus on the ultimate prize. I just want to thank Eric Herrmann for gracing this league with his incredible talent, and (at least as importantly) his calm, cool, sportsmanlike demeanor. Our best to you, Eric! You may have only been a part of this league for a short time, but your legend will live on in Karl Strauss war stories for years to come…

Silas Perks…Silver’s shining shield…regular season MVP…hard to beat once, let alone twice, let very much alone thrice…the new gold standard in SDFHL goaltending. Kalen Hunter is not impressed. He made a fat wad out of all of that laud and threw it on the ground. For those of you who missed Hunter’s Week Three act…it was shocking…it was awesome…it was shock and awesome. The speedy Young Canuck™ sniper made Silas look very ordinary, starting with a streak down the right side, and a lightning quick snap over Silas’ shoulder to put Charcoal in front early (from Jackson Tomaszewski). He wasn’t close to done with just the one, as he ripped home another with 0:50 left in the first (from Chris Tran and Shawna Hamon), then ANOTHER at 0:36 to play in the opening frame. That’s some straight cold-blooded ninja shite right there…dropping a hat trick on ‘the guy’ in one period…*shudder*. Owen Perks converted a nice pass from (who the F else…Hunter…second to Parsa Mostafavi) to make it 4-0, but the score might as well have been 85-0 at that point, as ready and rolling as Captain Hamon and her henchpeople were from the start. Just for good measure, it was Perks from Hunter again…a gorgeous passing play to cap a 5-0 flex to eliminate (and humiliate) a shell-shocked Aqua. Don Tran (14/14) was hardly tested in his shutout showing, while Silas Perks (19/24) was left shaking his head and tipping his cap to brother, Owen, and fellow Young Canuck™, Kalen, in a fill-in firing squad foray for (traitor) Chris Tran. Melissa Busby did absolutely nothing once again, but was awarded a pity third star as part of my pre-emptive campaign to avoid being cancelled. Captain Steph Palomo Schmidt and Aqua become the fourth team in the second season recycle bin, while Charcoal will look to lean on their youth and overall fitness to survive a back-to-back battle royale with Purple and Royal Blue in Week Four.

Playoff action commences after the Memorial Day Holiday. Enjoy the long weekend, and enjoy the tournament, if you are planning to come out and play!